When you feel chronically tired and drained you often end up feeling very lonely and isolated. Sometimes this is due to the inability to talk to their family and friends about your condition. Other times you may have tried to talk to them and felt like you weren’t listened to. If you are feeling as if no one listens to you, then the answer is to speak up more.
- Bring Them to the Doctor – If you have a good doctor, your best bet is to bring your loved one with the most trouble understanding or having empathy for you to the doctor with you. Let them ask questions. Tell your doctor it’s okay to answer. Caution: Only do this if you have a good doctor that truly understands your condition and the current treatment recommendations.
- Bring Them to Therapy with You – If you’re in any type of cognitive therapy, it can be helpful to have a session or two with the entire family as well as with your partner. Some of your family may need to seek help to learn to cope on their own too. Find a therapist who is trained in dealing with caregivers who take care of someone with chronic dis-ease.
- Tell Them What You Need – Most people do want to help. They just don’t know what you need. While you want to tell people what you need, avoid treating anyone like your second pair of hands or your maid. But if you need a cuddle, or you need rest, or you need some extra help with something, speak up.
- Tell Them What You Don’t Need – You’ll probably start getting a lot of suggestions about what to do about your condition. Try to understand that your friends and family want you to get better and can go through a stage of denial. Give them a chance but let them know when they are going too far.
As with any condition, if you don’t speak up for yourself and what you need, no one else will. But do try to understand their side of it too. It’s hard being a caregiver. On the other hand, you did not ask for this illness and you do need extra support. Keep talking and being open about your condition. Since the illness is not outwardly visible, you may need to remind people sometimes that you have a condition that keeps you fatigued. That can become frustrating.
It can help to share something someone else has written about how they wish people would treat them. You’ll find this kind of information on social media, in articles, or even YouTube stories. The more information most people have, the more they’ll want to be there for you.
Avoiding social isolation is an important factor when it comes to any chronic illness. We all need connection with other humans. It is how we are hNext time, learn some tips to help you avoid that problem even when you have CFS.